Confidence issues

Building your confidence in Oxford, Abingdon and Bampton

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Confidence is an odd thing, we know when we feel confident and when we don’t, but it’s difficult to pin down exactly what it is.

Confidence comes about by doing something repeatedly until it becomes second nature. One learns to drive confidently by doing the actions over and over again until we stop thinking about them, added to how we think or feel about day to day experiences.

There are many reasons why we lose confidence, sometimes it can be situations you wish you’d handled differently, or it could be a sudden accident which had nothing to do with you may have scared you so much you just stopped doing something. Sometimes it can be a sign of depression, as emotions begin to become numb.

I have had years of working with clients who have expressed lack of confidence in all kinds of situations, whether it’s at work, in a task they have been given to do, in social situations or in performance.

As an artist I have worked with people who would like to draw or paint better but stop themselves because all the negative chatter they experience. It may come about by parents or teachers not seeing the worth of creative work, or you may have had bad criticism over something you’ve made or painted. One’s negative self talk can keep those confidence levels way down.

How Hypnotherapy can help confidence issues

Hypnotherapy is a very useful tool in helping build self-confidence because it helps reduce the anxiety and the negative self-talk. It allows the part of the brain that governs control to have a greater effect on our behaviour. Visualisation can be a useful tool for training the brain to behave more confidently, without the fight or flight mechanism from kicking in.

How Solution-Focused Therapy can help Confidence issues

Solution-focused work looks at times when you’ve been confident in other situations and help translate that confidence to the areas which you feel less confidence in. There are times in your life when you have felt confident, so we focus on what you want to achieve and work out steps to achieve that goal.

How Cognitive Behavioural Therapy can help Confidence issues in Oxford

When we are stressed our brains want us to opt out of the situation, so our thoughts become negative, so we avoid the activity or interaction. CBT can help you work out what’s going on, what situations may be triggering the problem and how we can counter those thoughts with a more helpful self-talking approach. By experimenting, and keeping a diary of activities, you can learn the cycle of thoughts, behaviours and actions.

How Neurolinguistic programming can help confidence issues in Oxford

NLP is a useful visualisation/kinesthetic tool which can help link thoughts and feelings together. It can help scramble bad experiences which may be holding you back and encourage positive feelings.


Case Study in Confidence building

Jessica had been retired for a number of years, but was finding it difficult to walk. She had been tested for a variety of physical problems, even Parkinsons disease but all had come up negative. The doctor suggested it was a psychological problem, so she decided to try hypnotherapy, as she thought it might be a subconscious response.

Having seen retired people with confidence issues in the past that had manifested as shaking, I was confident that I could help her improve her walking.

The limit of her walking was indoors, out in the garden she was unable to walk without the help of sticks or her husband to hold her steady. Stairs too were a problem and at the initial consultation, she was very slow as she gingerly climbed the stairs to the therapy room.

The walking had become worse after retirement and it was hampering her going out and enjoying herself. It was worse after drinking and so with help of the explanation of how the brain works she decided to cut out wine altogether and just have a few beers.

We worked over a period of 5 weeks and the changes were nothing short of miraculous. I taught her some mindfulness and confidence building tools, and each week she set herself goals to achieve, starting with being able to walk across the road, to visiting a town she’d never set foot in before. Her husband too was ecstatic about her new found mobility as it meant she could have some independence.


If you would like an informal chat about what you would like to achieve, then call or if I’m in clinic and can’t answer my calls, then text Hypno to 07508 658934 or email solutionshypno(at)yahoo.co.uk, replacing the (AT) with @.


Also see: Feel confident like Wonder Woman


Penny Ling is a widely experienced hypnotherapist who has worked with everyone from top executives to stroke victims since 2007. She has been editor of Hypnotherapy Today Magazine and is a supervisor and mentor for members of the AfSFH and NCH.

Read Penny’s inspiring story How I beat all my phobias, or find out more how hypnotherapy could help your problem by downloading How Solution Focused Hypnotherapy can help with life. Feel free to send Penny a message here.


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